This place is quiet

There is a trickling return to normalcy. For instance homesickness does not plague me, nor does boredom find me lacking.

My brother talks, lately, about "getting It". He throws up respect for a surprising array of individuals we've all heard the names of. People who mastered their roles by reaching their potential and understanding that the only way they could ever truly ignite their flame is by paying strict attention to what fed it.

And yet, for many of us no single prhase leaps to mind. What is it that we truly love to do? Is it some latent genetic trait or the unintended consequence of a lifetime with eyes wide open? Is it possible to convince yourself that something in this wild world fits closely enough? If we try and fail, what is the recourse?

I said for the longest time that there are really two people in this world: Those with a plan and those without. Now this isn't a matter of one's superiority over the other, and we may even acknowledge that execution of one's plan is without relevance in the eyes of the universe. But what it does mean is an appreciation for the energy required to do these things one wants to do, and a willingness to admit that you have to start right now.

Anyway, its good to see this gleam in my brother's eye. He's learned for himself what makes life valuable, and what turns time into a tool rather than an obstacle. Rooming with him will do nothing if not encourage me that my own choices are valid, and irrevocable.

I've been able to start writing again, in degrees. Staring at skylines and taking evening bike rides to rouse some inspiration. This change in scenery has elicited the subtlest changes in my thinking, such that I've had to re-evaluate my objectives. Not on the whole, not in category or description or implementation. But rather in the words I actually put down, and the story I am trying to tell.

Anyway, hope all is well. I'm excited by an approaching visit. And I can't tell you the relief in a satisfying work environment. There is the feeling that once some final blocks fall into place (paychecks roll in, school starts again, I find a steady DD, etc) I will really be able to thrive here. Watch out.